


Abandon

by ShittyFlangstWriter



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Haikyuu!! Manga Spoilers, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-29
Updated: 2020-06-29
Packaged: 2021-03-04 02:42:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,819
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24962479
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShittyFlangstWriter/pseuds/ShittyFlangstWriter
Summary: He won, but at what cost?
Relationships: Miya Atsumu & Miya Osamu, Miya Atsumu & Sakusa Kiyoomi, Miya Atsumu/Sakusa Kiyoomi
Comments: 2
Kudos: 98





	Abandon

**Author's Note:**

> I know the summary makes it seem like a meme, but trust me, it's not.
> 
> Also, this made me crave boba lol

This was it, the final match of his high school life was over. Atsumu walks to the net ready to offer to shake the hand of the other captain, then getting rejected. After an exhausting five-set match in the finals, one part of him was close to falling face-first on the floor while the other part of him wants to play five more sets.

He had finally done it, the promise he made to himself when he was hailed captain and when he found out that his brother was quitting volleyball after high school. He had led his team to victory, they had won the Spring Tournament.

Standing on the opposite side of the net was his fellow captain and one of his most unexpected friends, Sakusa Kiyoomi. He had a reputation of never shaking the enemy's hand after the game, and Atsumu understood that after getting an explanation out of him when they talked once. That is, until now that Kiyoomi had extended his arm below the net and Atsumu's mouth fell open.

"Good game, Atsumu." He could only nod as Kiyoomi let his hand go and bowed to the referee on his side of the net.

Atsumu did the same to the referee near him before turning to face his team.

"Line up." he called out to them as he jogged to the bleachers.

"Thank you for your support!" He yelled as he bowed and his team mimicked him. The claps and cheers from the bleachers weren't foreign, however, a few familiar voices stood out and made Atsumu raise his head. There in the front row, were his seniors, wearing expressions that had never been directed toward him and toward anything he did before, pride.

Ren with his small smile and enthusiastic clapping; Michinari and Aran with their hollering and arms around each other; and Shinsuke with a proud, serene, if not smug, smile on his face as clapped. He had done it, he had made his seniors proud. There was only one thing left.

He looked to his brother was standing next to him, his usually blank face was replaced with a small smile as he waved to their seniors. _He's happy_ , Atsumu thought.

After the award's ceremony, they walked back to the locker room, their energy bouncing off the otherwise empty hallway of the arena. Near the entrance of the locker room, their seniors were waiting for them conversing among themselves. The second years ran to them bowing and greeting them as they went.

Atsumu avoided the commotion and headed to the showers. He didn't want to think about it right now, the win, the game and the end. He wanted to forget that this was the last game that he and his brother will play together. He wanted to forget that after this, they weren't the Miya Twins anymore. He wanted to forget that he may never find a partner that will replace his brother. He didn't want to think that while his brother will do fine without him, he would be a wreck without Osamu.

He had lost track of time after he'd finished washing his body for the third time. Lathering up and rinsing once more, he then started drying himself. Finishing up he walked out of the showers wearing his boxers and a shirt. His teammates, present and former, have migrated to the inside of the locker room, talking boisterously as they joked with each other. Michinari was pointing an accusatory finger at Shinsuke as he smiled fondly while shaking his head.

From his peripheral, he saw something move from the open door. Looking to his right, he saw Kiyoomi standing there, judging by his stare (read: glare), he had been waiting a relatively long time for Atsumu. He hurriedly walked to his locker and put on a fresh pair of sweatpants and his jacket.

"Oi, Atsumu, wher've ya been?" Aran called out to him.

"Just in the showers Aran-san. D'ya miss me that much?" Atsumu raised an eyebrow at him, a teasing smirk on is lips.

"Ya, ya, congrats man!" Atsumu jumped out of the way as Aran attempted to wrap his arm around him.

"I've gotta get goin', 'Samu, you know what to tell coach don'cha?" Atsumu said as he slung his bag on his shoulder.

"Yeah, yeah, get out o' 'ere 'fore I change my mind." Osamu said from where he was standing between Shinsuke and Rintarou.

"'m off, sorry I couldn't stay long." he said with fake sympathy as he headed out the door.

"I hope you're clean." Kiyoomi told him once he was next to him.

"I'll have ya know, that I scrubbed more than three times, Sakkun!"

"That's not supposed to be an achievement Atsumu, it should be a necessity." As a reply, Atsumu squawked indignantly as they exited the building.

They were walking in silence when Atsumu decided to break it just as Kiyoomi took his keys from his pocket.

"How does yer skin never get damaged, huh, Sakkun? It felt so soft when ya actually let me touch ya." Atsumu asked.

It happened one time, it was a little past Inter High and, once again, they had both lost. Atsumu had felt incredibly depressed due to his brother's approaching retirement from volleyball and had shouldered all the blame from the loss. To Kiyoomi, it was unnerving to see him in such a state so he told Atsumu that after he had showered, _thoroughly_ , that he will be allowed _one_ hug.

Being the guy that he is, Atsumu took a ten-minute shower and had clung to the other for a solid five minutes before letting go. He kept nuzzling into the other's neck and even Kiyoomi had to admit, after the initial thirty-second-bout of disgust, that it was pretty comforting. When Kenji found them, he took several pictures that, until this moment, their fellow captains use for blackmail.

"It doesn't hurt to use moisturizer, Atsumu. In fact, you'd be doing your hands a favor if you did."

"I'll have ya know that I use lotion, but my skin never cooperates!" Atsumu yelled indignantly as Kiyoomi locked the door and took off his jacket.

"Wash your hands when you've finished with your things." Kiyoomi said instead as he took off his shoes and placing them neatly in the shoe rack.

"I missed this place! Is yer sister home?" Atsumu was currently taking off his sweater and shoes then putting them in their respective places. They were in Kiyoomi's and his sister's apartment that was a three-minute walk from the venue. It was a standard western style studio apartment, that is, standard for someone as rich as the Sakusa family.

"No, she's in Paris doing whatever designers do overseas." Kiyoomi had called from the kitchen.

"Wa-"

"Wash my hands, yeah I know, just finished untyin' my shoes, I'm 'ere." Atsumu cut him off as he entered the kitchen and saw Kiyoomi wiping his hands on a towel.

He walked over to the sink and began washing his hands in the meticulous way that one needs to master in order to be in Sakusa Kiyoomi's living space.

"Do you want to drink tea?" Kiyoomi asked as he walked to the cupboards.

"I'm in the mood for boba." Atsumu said instead as he picked under his nails.

"Why didn't you say so when we were outside, we could have bought some?" The thing with Kiyoomi is that he treats his friends like a charity case. He wasn't trying to be arrogant by brandishing his money everywhere, he was just raised that way.

"Nah, _that_ wouldn't be fun now would it?" Atsumu asked.

"What are you suggesting?" Kiyoomi asked warily, eyeing Atsumu's smirk, the one that meant trouble for him and everyone in a five-meter radius.

"There's a grocery store nearby right?"

===============

"No, we are not making tapioca balls from scratch." Kiyoomi said firmly from where he stood next to Atsumu.

"But Sakkun, this is _way_ more fun than buying pre-made boba." Atsumu whined.

"Neither of us had tried to do it before Atsumu, this is a disaster waiting to happen."

"Yet ya allowed it by takin' me shoppin'." Atsumu smirked as he held Kiyoomi's gaze (read: glare).

"Also, who knows what sorts of bacteria went into makin' of pre-made boba?" He tested trying to gauge a reaction from the other.

"If this backfires, you're cleaning this up."

Atsumu cheered and dropped a package of tapioca flour into the basket.

"D'ya have brown sugar at yer apartment?" Atsumu asked eyeing the pack at the far right corner.

"Yeah, I restocked on some basics and toiletries before my sister left."

"So, we just need milk and tea?"

"I have earl grey at home?" Kiyoomi asked.

"'s fine, can I get a cocoa pack too?" Atsumu said as he took one from the shelf.

"Get whatever you want, you're not exactly new to this are you?" Kiyoomi said.

"Yer right, ya spoil yer friends a bit too much Sakkun."

"If you want to return the chips then just say so." Kiyoomi trailed off slyly.

"No!"

===============

Kiyoomi was surprised, to say the least. As he watched as Atsumu worked fluidly in the kitchen while he prepared the tapioca balls. After shaping them into little spheres, he started steeping the tea leaves in a tea pot with a filter. When he deemed the tea ready, he began to boil the tapioca in the water adding the brown sugar after a few minutes.

Atsumu poured a small amount of tea into a cup and handed it to Kiyoomi. When he tasted it, he didn't know what to say. The brash Miya Atsumu can make _perfect_ tea. He didn't know how to wrap his head around the idea presented to him so he just nodded.

"How sweet do ya want yers?" Atsumu asked as he took the tapioca balls from the stove and set it to cool from the side.

"I'll be fine with a teaspoon of sugar I guess." Atsumu nodded as he grabbed two large glasses from the cabinet.

He put all the ingredients in a steel cup meant for bartending, god knows why his sister has that, and prepared the drink with near expert precision. _How_ , was the only thought running through Kiyoomi's mind, _how did I not know about this_ _?_

Atsumu set down the drink in front of him putting a metal straw in before he got back to work for his own boba drink. Taking a sip, he was astounded, it was _perfect_. _Why doesn't he start a food business too_ _?_

"Okay, let's go watch a movie, I'll clean all this up later, I swear." There wasn't really that much to clean, to be honest, except for the pan, the pot and a few traces of tapioca starch here and there.

Once they were seated in front of the huge TV Kiyoomi had in the living room, he turned to Atsumu.

"What's really going on here?"

"So, ya noticed huh?" Atsumu said as he set his drink to rest on the coffee table in front of him.

"You'd have already talked my ear off while you were making this if nothing had been bothering you." Kiyoomi stated.

"How d'ya do that Sakkun? Ya always know when somethin's wrong with me." Atsumu said looking away.

"You're avoiding the question."

"Ya know, sometimes, I really wish yer just an airhead when it comes to subtleties like this." He said as he shook his head.

"It's about your brother isn't it?" Atsumu hadn't been specially vocal about it, but Kiyoomi knew that it bothered him to no end.

Taking his silence as an answer, Kiyoomi decides to try to get him to talk.

"Did you say anything to him earlier?"

"I have until I get back to Hyogo ya know?"

"So you didn't?" Kiyoomi said instead.

The apartment was lit with the afternoon sun and its orange glow shone into Atsumu's eyes making the corners glow with his unshed tears. A widely known fact about Atsumu was that he was a drama queen, he whined all the time and threw tantrums to get what he wants. A lesser known fact, however, is that his tears were extremely valuable. He rarely cried for real reasons, he'd shed a few tears because of a movie, but that was it, he won't be emotionally affected after the movie was finished.

This however, is something that has been bothering him for more than a year now. This was something that Atsumu can't just shrug off when he wants to. Kiyoomi has yet to witness him cry (except for that one time when the entirety of the group of captains cried over Into the Forest of Fireflies' Light) for real.

"He's leavin' me Sakkun, and I can't do anythin' about it." His voice cracked.

Another lesser known fact about Atsumu, he had abandonment issues, he had yet to tell Kiyoomi of its existence and why he had them, but he had deduced as much.

"He's not leaving you, Atsumu."

"Why is he leavin' me Sakkun? I know he's got his own life, but we're supposed to be together forever right? How can I be the Miya Twins by myself? I don't need my spiker, Sakkun. I need my brother, and he's leavin' me. He's got his own life, and I'm not part of it." He said as the first few tears fell from his eyes. He covered his face with his hands and bowed so that his head was on the throw pillow on his lap

"I'll say it again, he's not leaving you Atsumu, he's leaving the sport. You're his brother, he'll never abandon you just because he stopped playing." Kiyoomi said slowly.

Atsumu laughed humorlessly as he turned his head to the side.

"Ya don't know that Sakkun." He whispered.

"You're right, I don't know that, but I know that he legitimately loves you. Both of you may fight 24/7 but that doesn't change the fact that he loves you. Talk to him about this Atsumu. Does he even know about your... issues with abandonment?" At that, the other's eyes go wide and he rises his head from the pillow.

"I haven't told ya 'bout that, have I?" He said.

"You haven't, I just deduced as much, you also talked in your sleep that one time in summer."

"Oh."

"I'm not going to pry into that, but talk to your brother about this, he'll listen. If anything, he's the better listener between the two of you." Atsumu laughed at that.

"I just, really don't wanna lose 'im. My family never cared that much for me, he's the only one I have." Atsumu said in a quiet voice.

"You have me." Kiyoomi said.

The other's eyes snap to meet his as they begin to water once more. His face reflects an expression of hurt and surprise, as if it pained him to hear those words.

"Sakkun." He said breathlessly, his tears falling again.

"You don't have to hide you know, I won't judge you. Not when we're so alike."

"Ya have no idea how much those words mean to me." Atsumu whispered as the tears kept coming, but he was smiling, a genuine smile, and that was all that mattered at the moment.

"I actually do." Kiyoomi whispered back.

"You can hug me once." He added.

"Oh, lemme just take a quick shower." As Atsumu moved to stand up, Kiyoomi grabbed his wrist and pulled him back to the couch.

"You don't have to, I'll just bathe after this." He didn't mind the germs for now, he silenced the voices in his head and ignored that tingles he felt under his skin. Atsumu needed him _now_ , the sanitation can wait even just this once.

Atsumu scooted closer to Kiyoomi, inch by inch, he tested to see if he'd flinch away or tell him that he was getting too close. Such a warning never came, taking that as assurance, he shifted closer until their arms were touching. Kiyoomi put his arm around the other's shoulders and settled its weight on him. Atsumu froze, as far as he knew, this was the first time he initiated contact, with _anyone_. He didn't dare move as he waited for Kiyoomi to say something.

"You have five minutes." He laughed at that and began to snuggle into Kiyoomi's neck the same way that he did back then.

"I'll be here Atsumu, I won't leave, for as long as you'll have me." Kiyoomi whispered to him.

He wanted to ask what he meant with his words, but he didn't. Today wasn't the right time for that. Today is for them to comfort each other and that is what it will be. There will be a time for them to sort things between themselves, but that is not right now.

"I'll never leave, and I'll never let you go Omi." He whispered back.

**Author's Note:**

> Please comment what you think! ..V.


End file.
